Early in My Career

When I was a younger teacher, maybe my third or fourth year, I encountered a situation that still warms my heart. I had a particularly challenging young lady, as most 8th grade girls are, and her name was Ashton, not her real name. Ashton was that rare beast, or at least at that time she was a rare beast, of an 8th grader. She had the look of someone who had done A LOT of living. She resembled a 40 year complete with a really rough, I smoke a pack day, voice and just a really WORLDLY demeanor. She was a tough nut, as they say.

One afternoon I called Ashton's house to discuss her surly behavior and Ashton answers the phone. I identify myself and she says, "Hang on Ms. N, let me get my mom." Two seconds later another preadolescent voice takes the phone and is introduced to me as Ashton's mother. I'm not detective folks, but I knew this wasn't the kid's mother. So... I have the discussion I intended to have with her actual mother and maybe I embellished a little bit, said somethings I might not ever say to a parent and was assured by mother that I would not have another moment's trouble with Miss Ashton, giggle giggle in the background. I was nothing if not proud and determined when I was new to the classroom and I was damned if a 13 year old was going to pull one over on me! I steamed. I plotted my revenge!

I waited until 8 pm to call back. When the phone was answered this time it was a real adult . I introduced myself as Ms. N and said that I just wanted to clear up a few things with Ms. Ashton's mother from our earlier afternoon conversation. Of course mother was really perplexed. "What earlier conversation?" She asked. "Oh," I replied innocently, "the one we had about Ashton's behavior today." "We didn't talk today." She says. "Oh," again as innocently as possible, "we didn't? Because when I called this afternoon Ashton told me that she would get her mother and then I spoke to someone else then who claimed to be you." Do you remember that scene in the film, A Christmas Story? The one where Ralphie is being punished for uttering the F word? His mother calls the mother of his friend Swartz and tells her that Ralphie heard that abominable word from Swartz. What transpires is we get to hear Swartz's mother beat his ass. That very thing happened here. Ashton's mother screams her name and summons the child within earshot and proceeds to really go to town. I even think that perhaps Ashton got an ass whippin' too that night, much to my sadistic delight.
My husband walked past me and asked what was with my big goofy grin. I hung up the phone and replied triumphantly, "somewhere in our town tonight a kid is getting her ass whipped and that's a comforting thing."
Of course I realize how cruel this must make me sound. I get it, you bleeding hearts. I don't condone beating your kids. I do, however, believe that sometimes each one of us has a moment when our uppence comes and that night I witnessed that moment for Ashton.